A WOW interview! Well done Tom Bilyeu for such a great interview! One of the best interviews I've watched with Tony Robbins. He talks about having strategies for your life, moving beyond just dabbling in things to the mastery of things, focusing on the things that really matter, the two parts of an extraordinary life and living in a beautiful state.
There were so many great insights in this interview I couldn't help myself but to write so many of them out. Below are some quotes, statements and strategies that really stood out.
Acknowledge the uncomfortable truth that you don’t want to
- Money will make you more of what you are. If you’re mean, it will make you more mean, if you’re giving, it will make you more giving. It will give you the time to be you more. Money doesn’t change anything, it just magnifies you.
- Find a way to add more value than any other person in your industry.
- If you want to change your life, figure out how your worst day was your best day.
- A beautiful thing to say to your partner when they are making a huge, scary, decision that will change the course of their life dramatically but is a decision that they feel really strongly about 'I bet on you!'
- In your business, make decisions based on what you love.
"Success leaves clues" - Jim Rohn
Figure out what a successful person is doing and do that. Sew the same seeds. Find out what emotionally rich, physically rich, financially rich people read, do, think and what daily disciplines do they do and go and do that.;
Tony's experience with people and his events
Everything we do externally starts internally. You need to solve the problem for yourself first and come from that place when you are interviewing people.
You need to figure out the pathway to power. Once you figure out the pathway to power and the pattern effectiveness - the model, then you can teach that to other people. People can then make it uniquely their own but the foundation is there.
In Tony's events, 12 hours is a long time for people to sit. Usually, 2 hours is enough they say prior to the event. People want the information but they want to be entertained first. So Tony entertains them first at a level where they are laughing, crying, moving where time disappears but at the same time he is teaching them with a tool, an insight, a system. He gets them to do something while they are there to empower them. This is to get them wired and out of their mind.
The modelling skill set is really valuable. Study the brain. Then study magic.
The greatest magic tricks ever where the ones that you looked at and said it is either real magic or you planned this so far in advance that no human would ever plan that far in advance. The answer - you plan that far in advance.
Tony prepares for 18 hours for one of the interviews that he does. When people ask Tony’s wife ‘what is one thing people don’t know about Tony?’ her response is ‘The level he prepares.’ You have to go to the level of preparation in interviewing people to ask questions that no one else has asked before. You have to be able to pitch and catch and throw the ball back in an interview. That’s where you get something that is really exciting. The level of preparation allows you to go off script.
Don’t be an f’n dabbler
What does it take to get happiness? Progress. When you’re making progress you’re feeling good. When you're sitting around you’re not happy. We have to grow.
In the beginning of everything, it’s fun. When you hit the plateau you think it’s the wrong job, the wrong relationship… You need to find a way to go deep and know more about it so you can help as many people as possible and that is mastery.
"Most people dabble in a million things and master nothing and they wonder why they are unfulfilled. They are running for the sugar, the next thing that feels good. Instead of getting past what doesn’t feel good and getting to where you own something."
- Body - without that everything else is out the door. You don’t want to be the richest man in the graveyard. If there is energy, vitality and strength, it’s going to show up in your relationship, your business and your life. You have to master it, you can’t dabble, it’s too important.
- Emotions are everything. If you have a tonne of money, everyone loves you and you’re pissed off and frustrated then your life is pissed off and frustrated and your life is not great.
- Relationships - intimate relationships especially. Where the most juice and life comes from, the most pain comes from for most people. It’s worth mastering than dabbling.
- Time - you have to master your time. What are you going to do with it? Don’t mistake movement for achievement. Squeeze out the time that matters. It creates value for you and everyone you care about and love.
- Career and Business - Most businesses are dabblers, that’s why 96% of them don’t make it. In any 10 year period of time, only 4% make it. It doesn’t mean they profitable and it doesn’t mean they are enjoying themselves.
- Money - really mastering money so that it’s not a question in your life. You can love, do, give and share as much as you want and you’re not stressed about it.
- Spiritually - whatever you believe you’ve got to live it and it should lead to growing and giving. If you’re growing, you feel alive, if you’re giving you feel 10 x more alive. If someone can celebrate and give then that’s spiritual state.
The above areas Tony looks at mastering.
Tony is passionate about finding who these people are that live life this way and sharing what they do differently. Learning it for himself and teaching it to everyone else.
The metrics to an extraordinary life
What the 3 most important metrics in the psychological realm people need to judge their progress by?
Psychological Realm - people need to measure themselves differently because people value things differently.
What are the things that need to be measured to know if your life is going to work or not?
Our whole lives are guided moment by moment based on the state we are in. Being able to change your state (not bullshit but real) and go from pissed off, frustrated, freaked out back in your centre or creative or determined or something that’s going to move your forward and create a better quality of life for you. This is a critical skill set.
Moment to moment in life is controlled by states. If you’re angry you’re going to respond differently to when feeling playful. But what controls your state long term is your model of the world. Your world view. It’s controlled by these things;
- What is the target you are after? The 6 human needs. Visit this page…
- The beliefs and rules that drive the 6 human needs. What does it take for you to feel loved or certain?
What does and extraordinary, magnificent life look like? Life on their terms and everyone has different terms.
You can use metrics in your life to measure where you’re at by saying ‘on a scale of one to ten where am I with enthusiasm in my life? 7. Ok well, my metric is to be 8 or above.’
There are two parts to an extraordinary life on your terms
1 - Mastering the skill of the science of achievement
How do I take what I envision and make it real? How do I do that quicker, faster, better and easier?
The ability to manifest what you come up with and make it real, that’s a skill set. You can save yourself a decade by modelling what works.
There are a lot of people good at this but they still don’t have an extraordinary life. They create great change in their external world but not the internal world which leads into the second skill.
2 - The art of fulfilment
If you want an extraordinary life, you can’t just achieve, you’ve got to be fulfilled. It’s an art, not a science.
Science - It’s a science to making money - if you do these things you’ll make an abundance of money. There’s a science to the body with some fundamental laws. If you violate that science you’re going to have disease and low energy. If you align with the science, then you’re going to have an abundant of energy, it’s a science.
Fulfilment is not like that. Fulfilment is as different as human beings. You want to know what God or the Universe likes then look at the jungle, the forest, it’s diverse. Most people think they want to get ‘that’ because they’ve been modelling someone else. That might work on how to achieve something but it will never work in wanting to fulfil you.
Success without fulfilment is the ultimate failure
Our lives are controlled by one thing alone - decisions. The universe, God, whatever you want to call it is there to support us but it also gives us choices.
It’s not the conditions you're in, but the decisions you make.
Living in a beautiful state
The most important decision you can make is deciding no matter what happens in your life you’re going to live in a beautiful state.
A beautiful state means you’re not going to suffer, you’re going to feel creative, or you’re going to be passionate, live in awe, love...
This is the core essence of who you are without fear.
The way you suffer is you focus on yourself.
Suffering comes when you obsess about yourselves. What you should have done or what others should have done for you. It’s the me, me, me, me game. When you do suffer it’s because you’re worrying about something in the future - worry, anger, frustration… anything that takes you out of a beautiful state. Instead, how do we do more, give more, share more, love more…
Here is what people don’t get - you can end suffering. You can get out of it in an instant.
Your brain is a 2 million old device that is not designed to make you happy. It’s designed to make you survive.
Life is short. If you only had a week to live, you wouldn’t suffer over the little things that you usually suffer over. You would spend time with those that you love, you would do what you love, you’d be in awe of the sunset... Why Wait?
Why not just decide that if I start to suffer, that suffering is just me obsessing about me.
If you’re worried about your kids, your really worrying that you haven’t done enough for your kids.
You can end that in an instant by saying ‘I have made the most important decision of all. I’m going to live in a beautiful state.’
Things are going to happen in life, divorce, bankruptcy, cancer, death… no one really knows what’s going to happen but here is what you can know - you can decide that you are going to have a great life.
We think we have to behave a certain way in order to be happy and rely on those around us to make us happy. We need to live from the inside out not the outside in.
It’s important to achieve but it’s more important to enjoy. When you’re feeling loving, playful, joyous and in awe then you treat people the same way. You’re going to be a better parent, lover, business partner…
Tony is a strategist first. You have to look at your strategy in life but you also have to look at your philosophy.
Success for most people is hitting expectation. Trade your expectation for appreciation and you can change your world instantly.
If you can’t find ecstasy in this moment, more money or success is not going to give it to you. Wealth is a decision. Why not have it now.
“I'm unstoppable because I decided I am" - Tony Robbins
Interview by Tom Bilyeu